Some of the actual segment list.

ANY ATTEMPT ON
THE PART OF THE UNITED ARMED PENGUIN FRONT NEITHER EXISTS
NOR PARTAKES IN ANY EXISTENCE-LIKE ACTIVITIES EXCEPT FOR THE OCCASIONAL
VISIT TO ALL-YOU-CAN-EAT SEAFOOD BARS OR SUSHI RESTAURANTS. IT IS
LIKEWISE RIDICULOUS TO ASSUME THAT THE METACARTOONIST COULD BE UNDER
THE CONTROL OF THE UNITED ARMED PENGUIN FRONT BECAUSE THE
UNITED ARMED PENGUIN FRONT DOES NOT EXIST AND THUS CAN
EXERT NO SUCH CONTROL. PLEASE RETURN TO YOUR PLACES OF BUSINESS AND CONTINUE ABOUT YOUR DAILY ACTIVITIES UNTIL SUCH TIME AS YOU ARE NOTIFIED THAT THE METACARTOONIST COULD BE UNDER THE CONTROL OF THE UNITED ARMED PENGUIN FRONT IS AN EXERCISE IN FUTILITY, BECAUSE THE UNITED ARMED PENGUIN FRONT NEITHER EXISTS NOR PARTAKES IN ANY EXISTENCE-LIKE ACTIVITIES EXCEPT FOR THE OCCASIONAL VISIT TO ALL-YOU-CAN-EAT SEAFOOD BARS OR SUSHI RESTAURANTS.